Let Down
by lotsa-ppl-luv-me
Summary: Songfic. Russian Roulette by Rihanna. Rated T just because


**Take a breath,  
Take it deep. **

I'm trapped. I'm a prisoner. Almost all alone. Except for him. I don't know exactly who he is. But, he's always there. I take a breath. It's deep. I do it for him. **  
**

**'Calm yourself', He says to me**

We hear the footsteps coming toward the door. I hate that noise. Everytime I hear it, it means something bad is about to happen. He tells me to calm down. I try to. For him. Only for him will I calm down. The things blow the door open and grab us out of the room.

**  
If you play, you play for keeps. **

The men, I now know they are, are talking they have surrounded me and carry their wands pointed at me. He was never there for me. He was one of them. He was preparing me for this. A controlling-looking man speaks and he say that if the men play they play for keeps.

**  
Take the gun and count to three.**

He tells them to take the wand and count to three. I'm now standing at the far end of a long room with several other scared looking people. A vicious-looking man is pointing his wand at a small blonde-haired girl.**  
**

**Im sweating now,  
Moving slow,**

Drops of sweat roll down my face. I don't know what they're playing and it scares me. The man moves in slow-motion. His mouth forms the two words none of us in this line want to hear. A jet of green light shoots out of the tip of his wand and strikes the poor girl in the middle of her chest.**  
**

**No time to think. My turn to go**

Everyone else has gone. I am the last one in the line. No time to think about this, it's my turn to go.**  
**

**And you can see my heart beating  
You can see it through my chest.**

They have stripped me of my dignity, of hope, and they've taken everything from me. So, of course, they'll strip me of my clothes and take them away. I'm positive they can see my heart beating throught my chest. It wants to be released from this body that is about to die.

**  
Said I'm terrified but I'm not leaving**

I'm terrified. But I can't leave. They've chained me to the floor as if they think I'd try to run.**  
**

**I know that I must pass this test**

I know that I must pass this. Maybe if I don't show fear they will leave me alone and let me be free.**  
**

**So, just pull the trigger**

He raises his wand and points it at me.****

Say a prayer to yourself

I flashback to the time when he had told me to say a prayer to myself. I did and it helped with the pain that had followed.

**  
He says 'close your eyes, sometimes it helps'**

The flashback ends and I hear his voice in my head. 'Close your eyes, it helps for most people.'

**  
And then I get a scary thought  
That he's here - means he's never lost**

Then I think: He's smart, he's got to be. I should listen. He's here. That must mean he's never lost.****

And you can see my heart beating.  
No, You can see it through my chest.

My heart beats faster. They can all probably see it. I'll never survive if it keeps beating like this.**  
**

**Said I'm terrified but I'm not leaving**

I can't leave. No matter how much I want to I can't. I'm here for him.

**  
Know that I must pass this test. **

I know that I must show no fear so I can stay here with him. I have to stay here with my Theodore.

**  
So, just pull my trigger **

I just want him to fire the curse already.****

As my life flashes before my eyes

He lifts the wand again and my life flashes before my eyes. I see all the times that Ron and I had rolled down the hills by our house. I saw Fred and George teasing me. I saw Tom in the Chamber, Harry covered in blood, dementors sucking the life from Harry, Sirius falling through the veil, Harry kissing me in the common room. Then it morphed into the Slytherin dungeons, and instead of Harry kissing me it was Theodore. Everything flashed before my eyes. Everything up until the blonde-headed girl dying.

**  
I'm wondering will I ever see another sunrise?**

I wonder if he will actually kill me. Will I ever be able to see the sunrise again?

**  
So many won't get the chance to say good-bye  
But its too late to think of the value of my life**

I think of all the people who had died before me. They never had the opportunity to say goodbye. I know it's too late to think about the importance of my life.****

And you can see my heart beating.  
No, You can see it through my chest.

They can probably see my heart beating through my chest. Hopefully, they see how it is slowing down. I am calming down just like he'd told me earlier.

**  
Said I'm terrified but I'm not leaving no**

I'm still scared but I won't show it. I'm not leaving this place, and I know it; I'm not leaving it physically or mentally.

**  
know that I must pass this test.**

I am passing this test, I have to.

**  
You can see my heart beating.  
Oh, You can see it through my chest.**

They can see my heart beating. His wand is raised up high and pointed straight at my face. My heart beats faster and shows I know it does by the way they look at my face.

**  
I'm terrified but I'm not leaving no  
know that I must pass this test.  
**

I'm frightened to my very bones. I see the murder in his eyes. I know that I must not flinch. Maybe I'll be saved at the last second.

**  
So, just pull the trigger**

The tip of his wand lit up green as his lips formed the deathly words. The ray of green shot straight for my face. My eyes widened as I realized there was no way I could miss it. Theodore had failed me. He had actually killed me.


End file.
